Ode to the Single Lady

August 14, 2012 · 18 comments

Special thanks to my good friend and fellow single lady Lauren for sending this to me. I just had to share, because, well, I’m pretty proud to be an imaginary board-pinning, Anthropologie-loitering single woman. High five and cheers, girls. Cue the Beyonce.

You’re Sending Out Fancy Invitations, I’m Pinning Things To An Imaginary Board Aug. 8, 2012 By Stephanie White

You’re registering at Williams-Sonoma, I’m loitering at Anthropologie.

You’re excited to settle down with your husband-to-be, I can barely commit to a Facebook profile picture.

You’re polishing your new ring, I’m counting that last rain storm as a car wash.

You two just saw Dudamel at the Bowl, I just YouTubed Bieber’s newest video featuring Big Sean.

You’re sending out fancy invitations, I’m pinning things to an imaginary board.

You’re hanging with the soon-to-be in-laws, I’m making small talk with a homeless man in Westwood.

You just hired a landscaper, I just went to Yogurtland.    […or Skinny Dip/Menchies over here]

You’re picking out your white dress, I’m wearing a shirt from 10th grade (hey now, it still kinda fits).

You’re grocery shopping for two, I’m eating trail mix for dinner.

You’re writing thank you notes on monogrammed stationery, I’m instagramming my latte.

You’re making seasonal soups with your new immersion blender, I just microwaved my dinner in record time.

You’re thinking about getting a puppy, I managed to murder my succulent.

You guys just bought a Biscayne Ottoman at Restoration Hardware, I just found two quarters and a dime in my Craigslist couch.

You’re planning your honeymoon, I’m considering my night out in Silver Lake a staycation.

You’re in bed by nine, I’m watching old episodes of Felicity on my MacBook until two a.m.

You’re choosing fabric for your wedding day bunting, I just had to Google what that even is.

You two are going cake tasting, I just choked on a tofu sample in the middle of the Whole Foods salad bar (a stranger heimliched me, don’t worry about it).

Read more at http://thoughtcatalog.com/2012/youre-sending-out-fancy-invitations-im-pinning-things-to-an-imaginary-board/#Zl6woF5HbDV5XihO.99

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{ 17 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Katie August 14, 2012 at 10:38 am

I just got engaged and thankfully I still get to enjoy all those single lady behaviors just as much. Engaged, yes. Responsible, boring adult, nope. Not me! And that is a-okay with both me and the mister! Maybe one day 🙂
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2 Chelcie @ Chelcies FOod Files August 14, 2012 at 11:19 am

Hahaha this is great!


3 Rachel August 14, 2012 at 11:48 am

hahaha this is hysterical lol all my friends are talking about getting married and I’m like NOPE… Single lady is the way to be 😉
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4 Meg August 14, 2012 at 11:58 am

Love this! I am (newly) married… but definitely relate better to the second half of most of these. Too funny, thanks for sharing!
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5 Claire @ Live and Love to Eat August 14, 2012 at 12:32 pm

OMG love this post. I’ve been on both sides. 🙂
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6 Andrea @ Andrea Out Loud! August 14, 2012 at 12:33 pm

ahhhh ive been with my bf 9 years and i must be super lame (or actually, super awesome) because i much prefer doing the single lady things over choosing fabric for the wedding day bunting (yeah i had to google it too)
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7 Celia August 14, 2012 at 1:39 pm

Hahahaha! Love it.
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8 Alysha @Shesontherun August 14, 2012 at 3:10 pm

HAHA!! This made me smile. As someone who’s never been engaged, I can appreciate a lot of these things!
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9 Maggie August 14, 2012 at 3:44 pm

Huh. I’ve been married for five years and apparently I’m doing it wrong.
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10 Katie@perfectlypoppedkernel.com August 14, 2012 at 3:55 pm

Less than three months to my wedding… and, I’m totally looking forward to some Anthropologie shopping as soon as all of these expenses are done with! haha
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11 Yellow Haired Girl August 14, 2012 at 5:02 pm

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12 Katie @ Peace Love & Oats August 14, 2012 at 6:08 pm

This is hilarious! So true, except the bedtime one, haha marathon training = 9pm bedtime
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13 Emily @ Perfection Isn't Happy August 14, 2012 at 9:30 pm

Haha, this is funny :). I’ve been married for a month and I can still relate to a lot of the single lady things!
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14 Sarah B. August 14, 2012 at 11:15 pm

Haha LOVE THIS! I’m 24 and will be in my third wedding next June. Hopefully for once I have a date! Or, fingers crossed that a groomsman is cute.
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15 Julie @ Sweetly Balanced August 15, 2012 at 7:59 am

Haha!! I love this, it’s hysterical!! I’m engaged, but since my fiance and I work completely opposite hours , I still spend a lot of “single” time to myself and with my girlfriends. I miss him a lot, but have to admit, I also kind of enjoy getting the best of both worlds sometimes! 😉
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16 Alyssa August 15, 2012 at 11:56 am

Oh my gosh, I love this. Hahaha it’s so true! Hopefully I remain joyful of all the single lady things lol My favorite part was:

“You’re thinking about getting a puppy, I managed to murder my succulent.”

Me to a T! ha
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17 robfiasco @ run2thehills August 16, 2012 at 9:35 am

the single lady things sound far more entertaining!!!

my favorite: You’re in bed by nine, I’m watching old episodes of Felicity on my MacBook until two a.m.

with me it’s Friends, but i relate!


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