Everyone’s Least Favorite Person

September 16, 2011 · 32 comments

This was me yesterday.

I made everyone hate their lives. The cardiovascular way.

My little munchkins with sticks had to run suicides yesterday at the end of practice.

Allow me to rephrase: one suicide.

You would have think I made them marathon train with me.

(Sidenote: can we examine the fact that the girls complain about their adorable skirts with the compression shorts built in? If only they could see what MY middle school uniform looked like…)

Which they probably will today, because I’m printing out this picture to make them stop complaining.

And to teach them the importance of waxing your eyebrows. I clearly didn’t learn this until way after 6th grade.

And since I wasn’t quite firing on all cylinders yesterday (completely rare for me, I swear) and forgot my sports bra (don’t ask me how many times I’ve pulled that stunt), I ended up heading home for an outdoor run instead of meandering over to the gym.


It was a risky one, considering the stupid Gods of Fall decided to get their swag on beginning last night.

If you’re curious how I’m so smart to know that weather.com began in 1996……… I googled.

So, as the skies were darkening, I bagged up my iPod, strapped on the Garmin, and leashed up Chlodawg and drug her out the door with me. ‘Cause if I was getting caught in the rain, I wasn’t about to do it alone.

That’s right. I would. And guess who ran her first 4-miler with mom last night?

During my lecture with my girls yesterday afternoon about the importance of hydrating, I told them they need to hydrate all day. Before practice/games. “If you don’t like water, you can drink juice or G-rade or Crystal Lite.”

One of my sixth graders raised her hand and told me that her mom had the margarita flavor of Crystal Lite, but she said that it tasted like crap because you need tequila in it for it to taste decent.

I’m just really glad they’re listening to me and getting the point of my lectures.

At least this girl got it.

Sometimes, owning a 9-month-old Labrador and coaching a herd of middle schoolers is one and the same.

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{ 31 comments… read them below or add one }

1 katie September 16, 2011 at 2:55 pm

haha! Your pic captions are always cracking me the hell up!

I bet you are such a great coach! How fun!

Happy Weekend love! xoxo <3
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2 PavementRunner September 16, 2011 at 3:36 pm

Love that you took the pup for a run. Mine is always good for five. Let me rephrase, she runs her butt off for 4 then gets tired before the home stretch. She’ll never learn.
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3 katie @KatieDid September 16, 2011 at 4:29 pm

I bet coaching is such a blast! And it’s great you can weave some education about healthy living in there too. Creating the next healthy blogosphere generation perhaps?!?

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4 Alyssa @ Life of bLyss September 16, 2011 at 4:33 pm

haha. workin’ on it! ;) I’ve gotta get them to put down the pizza every day at lunch first.

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5 Faith @ For the Health of It September 16, 2011 at 4:37 pm

OMG I snorted out loud at the crystal light comment!
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6 Hollie @lolzthatswim(andrun) September 16, 2011 at 4:44 pm

I love your pic captions. How hilarious! Anyways-I used to hate running in 6th grade too (when we crossed trained for swim practice-I cried. ha). Wahh it’s low 40s up here which is most certainly not okay!
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7 Alyssa @ Life of bLyss September 16, 2011 at 5:41 pm

I CRIED TOO. what’s with us?! if only our middle school selves could see us now…

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8 Dorsa @ Running Thoughts September 16, 2011 at 4:52 pm

0ohh goodness you are too funny haha. I hope you gave Chloe a big treat after her run :)

ps NICE middle school uniforms, top notch :)
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9 Angela @ MyPinkyToes September 16, 2011 at 5:01 pm

This is post is so cute. I’m currently coaching middle school volleyball and just about lost it when I saw some of the girls walking during a four lap, slow slow slow jog warm-up. Ha!
Your dog is adorable. I’ve only taken my doggie with me for some short run/walks, but I think she’s getting the hang of it!
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10 Jenn's Adventures September 16, 2011 at 6:10 pm

You are SO BRAVE coaching middle-school sports!! And speaking of HYDRATING! Go check out my $10 Hawai’i Starbucks Card giveaway (http://tinyurl.com/638j7sk) — With the weather changing you’ll be craving Starbucks hardcore if you don’t already;)

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11 Tiff @ Love Sweat and Beers September 16, 2011 at 6:53 pm

Ha – I remember giving my coaches crap about making us all run suicides. You know what, I actually didn’t hate it nearly as much as I pretended to. :)
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12 Jessica @ Stylish Stealthy and Healthy September 16, 2011 at 7:19 pm

Ah suicides. Have you run one recently? So much different from when you’re 15. Things creak and crack on me that I didn’t know existed.
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13 Royar September 16, 2011 at 8:50 pm

You are always so hilarious! Congrats on the coaching! Last year we had to do ten suicides in a row for some ridiculous reason but one suicide is almost enjoyable sometimes! Chloe is too precious! XO
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14 Lindsay@ In Sweetness and In Health September 16, 2011 at 8:56 pm

Omg I love that a little girl talked about tequila haha! And weather.com can seriously ruin lives- it told me that tonight is supposed to be an effing low of 37 degrees…um where did summer go??

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15 Lauren September 16, 2011 at 9:03 pm

Love those doggy pictures!! Actually, I just love the words you put in her mouth. I was on my dance team, so there wasn’t any suicide running, but I seriously wanted to die every time we had to run a mile. I swear I could taste blood in my mouth afterwards! Now look at me. I love to run :P
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16 Julia @ The Coffee Crazed Teacher September 16, 2011 at 9:17 pm

haha hilarious! You crack me up!
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17 Lindsey @ Happy or Hungry September 17, 2011 at 2:27 am

Chloe kills me. She is so cute.
I NEED a sports bra to run. That is the only garment I actually need. I would even be okay running in the nuddy-pants with only a sports bra.
Ah you make me larf.
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18 Alyssa @ Life of bLyss September 17, 2011 at 3:58 am

I love that you said nuddy pants. you canadian, you.

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19 Colleen @ The Lunchbox Diaries September 17, 2011 at 2:33 am

I think I would die of laughter if I saw you with those girls.

And I would also tell that girl to bring you some marg flavored crystal light – and not to worry – Coach Alyssa will make it taste good :)
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20 Alyssa @ Life of bLyss September 17, 2011 at 3:58 am

hahaha you know me waaaay too well.

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21 Lara @TresLaLa September 17, 2011 at 3:22 am

LOVE the bubbles on the pics! Hilar! And that 6th grader… Hmmm… Keep an eye on her!

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22 Lizzie September 17, 2011 at 10:34 am

hahahahah! tequila in cyrstal light–weirddd!
and you are a great coach, ur gonna be awesome this season!
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23 Karla September 17, 2011 at 12:59 pm

Suicides were torture in my swimming days… now I don’t mind them so much. I can’t believe that SIXTH GRADER said that about it being better with tequila init. What is happening to the world?!

I may come steal Chloe someday. She’s so stinkin’ cute. and I need a running partner.
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24 Ali @ Ali Runs September 17, 2011 at 3:08 pm

Looking at your pics of Chloe makes me want my own dog so bad! Until I have the time/money/space, I’ll just live vicariously through you! :) PS: Suicides were always the WORST when I as playing soccer.
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25 Alyssa @ Life of bLyss September 17, 2011 at 9:05 pm

yes.. just “borrow” Chloe. getting a puppy is like getting a baby! ;)

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26 Amy @ Living N Learning September 17, 2011 at 4:05 pm

I wish I had someone to make me run or do something back in middle school. I wish I would have gotten into a routine, or at least have a base, of working out at a much younger age than trying to do it now for the first time.
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27 Alyssa @ Life of bLyss September 17, 2011 at 8:55 pm

there is something to be at said for starting early!

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28 alyssa - fashion fitness foodie September 17, 2011 at 10:32 pm

i love how creative you are with your captioning on the photos!

Lets see their outfits!
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29 Allison @ PickyEatingRD September 18, 2011 at 11:55 pm

I just saw that margarita crystal light. I thought it was a little weird but hey if a 6th grader insists on adding some tequila, it must make all the diff. I am sure her mom said that and she went on and repeated it lol.
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30 Brittany @ A Spoonful of Peanut Butter September 19, 2011 at 12:25 am

I’m loving all the pictures- I’m laughin so hard!! Sounds like coaching is…fun? haha. Hope the girl doesn’t add tequila to HER crystal light…oh lawdy!
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31 janae @hungryrunnergirl.com September 19, 2011 at 3:32 am

I WANT YOUR DOG SO BAD. Girl, I bet you are the BEST coach in the whole wide world. LOVE your middle school uniform!
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